Sunday, June 27, 2010

Stupid In Love. Post 19 & 20. (The Finale)

Ahh.. My amazing readers.. My FAMILY. You are the ROCK and the REASON this blog is still alive today. At the end of this post, comes the end of a second story.. Another life you've lived with me.. Another whirlwind of emotions we've felt together. I can't believe it's about to come to an end.. Wow..

Well here goes nothing..

*-*-*-*


Something shook my table so hard, I jumped in terror. I walked to my table and looked down..
















My oh my..
Guess who..
Na9er :)

El7ilu qarrar yidig:O

Didn't I tell you all? I'll make him come back. :)



I looked at my phone and raised an eyebrow with a smirk on my face before I picked up.

"Aloo?" I said irritatedly
"Aloo" He said
"Hii?" I asked
"Hey" was his reply
"Mmm..?"
"Why didn't you call me?" He asked
"Really?" I said
"Yeah, really" He replied
"Mu min9ijik sa7? Mu inta ile gayilee latdigeen 3alay?" I almost laughed
"I said that then because I was mad" He defended
"So you told me not to call you. I obeyed" I told him, "if you didn't mean it, why didn't you call me?" I asked him
"I wanted to see if you'd call" he said
"Aha. Well weren't you the one who said 'You know what?! Don't call me! Okay?! Don't call me!' huh? Wasn't it you? Or was it someone else?" I asked him stating what he said a week ago, but he didn't answer me.
"Okay. Na9er. Do you want to be with me or not? Because if you don't, I'll just leave." I said, "so yeah, tell me. Do you want to be with me or not?"
"Honestly?" He said
"La, not honestly. AKEED HONESTLY." I said
"No." He said, "I don't want to be with you." he continued
"Okay then. Thank you." I said, "I have to go now, tabi shay?" I asked him
"Wain ray7a?" He asked suspiciously
"Ba6la3 with my friend" I told him
"Mwa3da?" He asked sounding jealous
"NA3AM?!" I almost screamed
"Mwa3da?" He asked again
"Shaku mwa3da?!" I screamed
"3ayal wain betrou7een?" He asked
"We have a Halloween party tomorrow. We're going to get costumes." I said sincerely. I wasn't lying! So why should I hide anything?! Right?!
"Okay.." He said
"Yallah, I'm going to go. If you want anything, message me." I told him and hung up

I'm not in the mood to talk to him on the phone after what he said! Wila enshallah shayifnii sahla ya3nii?!

I picked up my Louis Vuitton Speedy bag and walked out of my room flicking the lights off as I left.
The deal was to meet up at Soug Sharg and get some coffee and then start the hunt.
As we walked around sipping our coffee, something caught my eye. And it was like a light bulb flicked on in my head.

What I saw were a pair of ears. Yes. EARS. Kitten, Leopard, and Rabbit ears.

I stopped in my tracks and looked at the stand outside of Claire's... Hmm.. Call them or not? I'M SO CALLING THEM!

I called Jawa and 3anoud and told them of what I found, and I put out my cards.. My idea..
I'd get us each a set of ears. The same color. And we'd get all dressed up as cats. Sexy, feisty cats. Something that would make a guy in the street stop and stare. Make him fantasize of what she could possibly do if she would flirt with him. THAT type of cats;) They were in. They were so excited over this, it's the first time we ever went to the extreme with costumes.

Now, the next night.. Was when we'd shock all the party people.

The night of the party; the girls came over to my place to get ready.
I remember me and Na9er were constantly texting that night, but why, or over what I'm not sure. :s
You know when Charlie's Angels walk in somewhere? How the three of them look so different, yet are so connected in some way? Yup! That was us when we walked in.


We payed our formalities with the other girls, then picked our sofa.

I remember him calling me in the middle of the party. He told me to hang up, but I wouldn't allow it. He had to let it out. And so, he told me that he was no good for me, but me, being the stubborn girl that I am, I told him off. I told him that it was my decision, and that it was my heart on the line, and not his. He also told me that he doesn't deserve my love, and yet again, I told him that it's not up to him who I fall in love with, and it's not something I can control.

That kind of killed my party buzz..

But my girls were quick to bring it back up, and I loved them for doing that!

But the real drama was yet to come..


-------------------------(Part 20)-------------------------

The Finale


The day after the party, I sat and thought to myself..
Maybe he has a point..
I tried..
I gave him my heart.. I cried so much over him.. I called, I practically begged him to make me his!
Wow, that looked like I was desperate..
Maybe someone else deserves my love? Someone who'll love me so much better than Na9er has ever loved me..
I kept thinking..
And my heart, and my mind was torn between two, to either walk away or to take whatever Na9er flings my way..


I called Jawa and talked to her for approximately an hour.. We weighed the pros and cons of my situation.

Na9er was a great guy, RAYYAL! He's a man for Gods sake! He can keep me safe! Someone lays a finger on me, he'll break it! He LOVES kids! Which shows he'll be a great father one day..
He was flirty, that's good and bad..
And the list went on and on..

It all weighed each other out..










I had my answer...





























This is the end of the road for us..














I couldn't call Na9er..
Just the sound of his voice would make me stay..
I had to do it the easy way..
Easy, but still tough..
It was through MSN..


I got online, with me fighting back tears. Chocking on them actually..
I opened a conversation with him..
And that's when all the tears came rushing out, like a waterfall that drowned my eyes, I could barely see what I was typing.

"Na9er. I've had enough. You had a point. I deserve someone better. And that's what I'm doing. I'm leaving. I'm erasing you out of my life. Bye. And I swear to you, you'll never find someone like me, you just wait and see."

I clicked enter.
Then I clicked block.
And last but not least. I clicked DELETE.
Part one, accomplished.


Next,
I deleted all his messages, cleared out my call log, and turned off my phone.
Part two, complete.


Now, for part three..
The depression, and the crying..
Man, oh man..
I locked myself up all week.. I cried and cried and cried..
And because of the depression, I BEGGED for a trip to the chalet. And.. I got it.. I need this..

It's been a while since I got on MSN from my phone, and when I did, he was there..
Yeah, you read that correctly, HE was there! As in NA9ER was there! On my contact list! Are you kidding me?! Are you fucking messing with me?!

Na9er says:
Hey

M;* says:
Hi

Na9er says:
Why's your phone turned off?

M;* says:
Because I turned it off?

Na9er says:
I need to talk to you

M;* says:
Not now. I'm going to bed.

Na9er says:
Can you call me tomorrow? Please.

M;* says:
Khair enshallah. I'll see what I can do.

Na9er says:
Please. And thank you.










I think he lost his mind. NOW he's looking for me?!
Na9er.
Two words baby.
FUCK OFF.



But..
After he told me that he needed to talk to me, there is no way in hell that I can let it go. I WANT to know now.
That dude knows how to push my buttons, and I hated that :(





I went to sleep with nothing but curiosity.. Hey, don't judge me. When you put yourself in my shoes, you'd probably know how it feels.

I woke up at around 8am. Min Allah, chithe ga3adt eb hal 7ezza. I washed up and got dressed and headed out for a morning walk.. It was refreshing.. The morning breeze, the music tantalizing every nerve in my brain.. I loved it..

Around 9am, I turned on my phone to find a message from Na9er, asking me to call him when I see this. His message came at around 8:45-ish in the morning..

I took a deep breath, and called him.. And within a few rings, he picked up..

"Aloo" he said
"Hii.." I whispered
"It's nice to hear your voice.." he told me
"Yours too.." I said
"Shlounich?" he asked me
"El7imdellah, I'm good.. What about you?" I asked
"Good good.." He trailed off

There was an awkward silence before I asked him,
"What was it that you wanted to talk to me about?"
"Maisa, awal shay, abii at2aseflich for everything I said.. I'm sorry, I was a complete jerk.. I didn't mean to do that to you.." he said
"Mmm.." I said
"You didn't deserve that.." he told me
"Na9er, I cried like fuck over you." I told him
"You said you get over someone fast" he reminded me
"I know what I said. And yes I do. But I kept everything bottled up inside until I finally broke down!" I jabbed into him
He was quiet..
I was quiet..
I just breathed into the phone.. It slowly got heavier at the sound of his voice, and how apologetic it sounded.. But I took a deep breathe and calmed myself down before I would allow a tear to come rolling out.
"Well, I called to apologize to you. And I want you to forgive me for everything I've done to you.. I didn't mean it. I just wanted to push you away, but I didn't know how, and I guess I did it the wrong way.. We're grown, and just cutting things off like that seems childish.." he said
"Yup, we're grown.." I repeated
"I mean, also, it's with my friends.. Like for me, when I get involved and I get attached then lose them, I just stop caring about everything, and I just can't afford that now.." he said
"Na9er! You don't just drop everything! You use it as a way to help you cope! To keep yourself busy!" I laughed
"Yeah, well I'm not like that.. I lock myself up.. I stray from my friends, I stop studying, and I just don't care.." he said
"Yeah, well you don't have to worry about that anymore.." I smiled
"I guess.. But I still want us to be friends.. And again, I'm sorry for hurting you.." he said again
"Don't worry about it!" I told him, "I'm sorry hun, but I have to go.." I acted disappointed
"It's okay.." He said, "and thank you for hearing me out.."
"Nooo problemmm!" I said, "Later.."
"Later" he mimicked












Wow.. Funny how everything turns out, eh?

I re-added Na9er to my MSN contact list.. We talked a couple times.. We became friends.. It was.. NORMAL.












But one day..
One day..
What I said would happen, HAPPENED.





Me and Na9er were talking.. And he asked me..

"Do you miss me?"

I was in awe.
Seriously? Did he just ask me that?

"Honestly?" I asked him
"Yes" he replied
"Sometimes.. I do.." I told him, "I don't miss the pain, but I sure miss all the fun times we had.." I added
"K" was his reply

Hurts, yeah? It's good you got a taste of your own medicine..

"Do YOU miss ME?" I asked him {PS: I was being sarcastic :)}
"Yes.." He said
"How much?;p" Kint ga3da asta3bi6, mu min 9ijjy! :O
"Alot.." he admitted..
My heart, STOPPED.

It happened.
I made him miss me.


Even though I brushed that encounter off, we still talk, and he still calls sometimes. Not like best friends, but we ask about each other from time to time.. And honestly, it's nice to know that I didn't lose him.. We were friends before this started.. Well, not for long, but we were friends.. And it was fun..

And I guess the answer to that question of, "Can you be friends with your ex?", is yes. As long as you both can put your differences aside, and be there for each other, and support each other.. Then it's all good..

My story with Na9er hasn't ended.. It's a start of a new friendship. I might never be his girl, and he might never be my man.. But in the end of the day, I know that if I need someone to lean on, he's there for me.. I leaned on him when there was tension with me and my friends, with me and my mother, with my brother, with anyone.. And he was there, he gave me advice that helped me with whatever situation I'm in..

A part of me will always love Na9er as more than a friend, I'll always remember him as my first kiss, I'll always remember the way his eyes look, and how he looks at me sometimes. I'll always remember how he laughs, and how he smiles that devilish smile of his.. Maybe I'll get jealous when I know he's not mine, that's just how us girls are.. But I know, in my heart of hearts, that I'll always be happy for him no matter who he's with, or what he's doing. As long as he's happy, I'll be more than happy..

There will always be that special someone that'll come into your life and affect you in so many way, good or bad, but it'll just show you how life is unpredictable, and how the slightest change, can change the course of nature completely.


*-*-*-*

Wow.. The end of another story.. How overwhelming.. But that's another step you guys moved forward with me..

I love you all!

Thank you for all the support you've given me through this whole year! And yes, WOW! It HAS been a year! Oh my Gosh!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Have an amazing summer! Enjoy it wherever you guys are!

And hopefully, when I get back, I'll have something new for you all:*

I love you;
-Q;*

Friday, June 25, 2010

Stupid In Love. Part 17 & 18.

I'll be out of here soon......
And if I get everything out perfectly, the story might end at part 20....
And hopefully, as soon as I get back, I might start another story... Lets see how well inspiration works with me while I'm gone, shall we? ;)

Each and everyone of you mean so much to me! Your support makes me so much stronger! Thank you! No matter how many times I say thank you, it won't be enough!
You don't know me, yet you're like my best friend! Living each moment with me, feeling what I'm feeling! I hope I give out as much emotion as I feel while writing these posts for you:*

So....

Without further ado, here's part 17 of Stupid In Love. :)

*-*-*-*

"Yallah, thilfay. Bye" and he hung up.

Na9er said that to me.
Was I dreaming it.
What was going on?!
What did I miss?!
What did I do?!
NA9ER!
WHAAAAAT?!

There, I looked like someone slapped me. So hard, my eyes were bulging out. So hard, my jaw dropped open, so big, I could feel the grass bristles on my chin.

"Uhh.. Uhhh.." I said, looking at Layal
"Shfeech?!" She asked

She ran to me and sat on the ground in front of me. She looked up to my eyes and saw the shock. It was practically like electric volts shooting out.

"SHGAL!?" she yelled
"Gally.. Gally.." I stammered
"SHGAL! TA7ACHAY!" She shook me
"Gally.. Thilfay.." I said and looked her back in her big dark brown eyes
"You're kidding right?" she asked me
"No.." I said in a low voice
"Snap out of this and fight back!" She told me

I got up, took a deep breathe, and walked away..

"Maisa!" She yelled
"Wait, you just wait.." I said
"MAISA! RIDAY 3ALAY!" She screamed louder

I turned around and looked at her.
I pulled out my phone, and punched Jawa's number in, and within seconds she picked up;
"Hala ib 7abeebtii!" she said
"You won't believe what just happened." I said
"Ha? Shfeech? What the fuck happened now?!" She said, "Sar shay 9a7?! Embayin min 9outich! Spill!" She yelled
"Gally athlif" I smiled
"La la, you're kidding 9a7?" she said in shock too
"Nope. I'm being serious. Do I SOUND like I'm kidding?!" I yelled
"And what did you say!?" she asked
"I hung up! Shbagoul ya3nii?!" I said
"MAISA! This isn't you! Min mita etkhaleen a7ed eghali6 3alaich?! You call him back and kick his fucking ass! You get that?!" She told me
"La 7abeebtii, I'm not calling back. I'm texting him. He'll hear my voice and I'll be yelling and he'll just yell back. I know him." I told her
"INZAIN SAWAY SHAY!" She said
"Ya zift! Basawii shay! Akalmich ba3dain, let me handle this." I told her
"You leave him, you fucking leave him. You deserve someone so much better!" I yelled
"Oh I know that, I'm going to make me him want me like fuck. You just wait and see. Ma6la3 bint oboy etha makhalayta yit7asef." I said
"Good! Now that's my girl!" She clapped
"Yeah, okay. Akalmich ba3dain." I said and hung up.

I started to walk back to Layal with so much determination in me.
"Emshay il baranda" I told her

I guess she saw the anger and determination in my eyes that she feared to say a word. She just walked behind me, and followed me like a stray puppy to the baranda.

I sat down, and pulled out my phone.
"I'm going to show you." I said in between my teeth.

I started writing the message to Na9er;

"Thelfay ha? Okay Na9er. This is it, if you can't respect me, then don't call me, and don't message me anymore. I'm not here for you to be disrespectful to me. Ga3adt wela mishayt sar 3indy nafs elshay, bel a5a9 3ugb ma giltly thelfay. So, good luck, and goodbye;)"

and I clicked send.
I waited for it to send completely. When it did, I sat back, raised my legs to rest on the railings of the balcony, and breathed in the fresh salty breeze..

A second later, my phone starts vibrating, I look down.. I think you know who it is..

Na9er :)

I showed it to Layal, then counted to 5..
1..
2..
3..
4..
5..

Deep breathe..

"Aloo." I said annoyed
"Are you serious about your message?" He asked me
"Yes. I'm serious. You called, ma shifta. I call you back tgouly rou7ay thilfay?! Wain ga3deen Na9er! Mani a9ghar 3yalik!" I yelled, I could feel the rage shaking him so hard, "oo ana kila ilee adig! It's like I'M running after you o inta matabii! That's it! Manii daga oo arkith warak oo akhrat'ha tgoulii hal 7achii!" I kept yelling

He was speechless..
Right then, my other phone started ringing and it was my mother.
"I have to go Na9er. When you know what you want, you know where to find me." I stated, and hung up.

My mother was just asking where we were, and asked us to go inside since it was getting kind of chilly.

We walked to my chalet, and collapsed on the sofa..

"Ufff!" Layal said
"Ta3abtay ha?" I smiled
"Eeeh! Wayid!" She laughed
"Mmm.. I want food" I said
"Me too!" She jumped
"Emshay, lets get il kakaw min il ma6ba5" I told her

We walked to the kitchen and got a hold of the food we bought, then went back and watched Charmed on MBC 4.

For 10 minutes, Na9er wasn't present in my mind.. :)
When I checked my phone again, oh wow.. A missed call.. :)
I showed it to Layal and laughed.

"Mu giltlich, he'll come running back?" I told her, then called him

"You called?" I asked
"Tawich tgouleen kila you call and I don't pick up, or I'm too busy to pick up o I only message you! Now who's not picking up!?" He yelled
"It was on silent oo shayla il vibrate! This is once! Inta kil mara!" I retorded
"You know what, don't call me." He said
"You don't want me to call you?!" I asked him almost bursting into laughter
"No, don't call me." he said again
"Okay, I won't call you." I laughed
"Okay. Bye." He said
"BYE." I said and hung up.

Okay. The dude had serious issues. Right?
3nad 3alaih, I turned off the phone :) Oh yes I did. He doesn't want me to call him, I will not fucking call him. I will not lose myself for him - even though I sorta kinda already did - but that's not what we're talking about right now.

I packed up my stuff, and that night, I'm heading home.
I'm gnna be strong.


----------------------------(Part 18)----------------------------

The drive home, was the complete opposite of the drive to chalet.
This drive, it was depressing songs. This time, it was anger that raged inside of me towards Na9er. How could he say something like that to me?! Ana al7een shsawait?! Out of the blue he tells me thelfay?! Inta ethlif!

I came home and made my way to my room, I flung my bag on my bed, and went to the bathroom to have a relaxing shower.. I need my alone time..

Half an hour of sitting under hot water, hugging my knees to my chest, just letting the water wash over me and take over my senses.. My eyes closed, and breathing so calmly..

My thoughts went back to the time when boys were nothing to us.. When boys to us girls were icky, and ugly. When we used to run from them just because we thought they had cooties. And now, almost every teenage girls' life revolves around a boy. And that boy, well, he'll probably just cause her heartbreak, pain, and give her a bunch of sleepless nights of her drowning her pillow with tears.

Why do we girls need boys? We don't need them, we're independent.. We're living in a period of time where women can hold their own! Then why ladies do we need men?! WHY!?

I keep asking myself that..
See, we'll never know the answer, but it's the simple law of attraction.. A man is always attracted to a woman, as a woman shall always be attracted to a man..

For the rest of the week, I've avoided calling him, messaging him, or even talking to him on MSN.
I'm standing my ground you jerk. Like I said, I'll make him regret it.

My girls stood by me, whenever I had this urge to call him, I'd call one of them up. And right then, they'd kill my urge to call him.
A week went by..

Saturday was the day he told me not to call him..






Sunday.. Nothing...











Monday.. Still nothing...











Tuesday.. I'm still waiting...













Wednesday.. I'm still waiting... I'm losing hope....













Thursday... I've lost hope... He's not gonna call me... I know it...











It was October 30th, 2009.
I don't know how I still remember the date. I think it was just that significant part of my life..
Me and 3anoud had a day planned to go shop for Halloween costumes. But unfortunately she couldn't make it. So I called up another friend and drove around the bright streets of Kuwait City trying to get a costume..
Before I headed out..
Something on the table started to shake..

*-*-*-*

Two posts in one! I know Part 18 isn't long, but I'll make it up to you all!:*
I love you all so much! I hope you liked it!:*

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Stupid In Love. Part 16.

My loves! I'm sorry for taking so long, but I've been really busy! I'm sorry my darlings! I'll try to finish the story before I leave for the summer, because I won't be posting anything while I'm away:( I'm sorry.
But here's part 16 :) I hope you enjoy it!

*-*-*-*

Well the distance.. I'll tell you what it did to us.. This is what happened..

After I went home and packed up, I left with my parents.. And the whole ride there, I had my iPod on, and my headphones in my ear, listening to music that reminded me of him, songs that had me smile at the thought of his lips on mine..
It was like I was in one of those romantic movies, we'd be driving, I'd be staring out the window, quietly singing along to the songs, smiling, with the boy I'm in love with running around in my head.. If it was real, and he really was running around, I think he'd be knocked out cold right now! But that doesn't matter.. What matters is that I had him, he was mine.. No one could take him away, not as long as I'm alive, not as long as we BOTH chose to be with each other.

The minute we got to the chalet, I smiled, and it was like a weight was lifted off my heart.. Like you were being cramped under a boulder, where you can't breathe or move, but someone just came and took it off of your chest, that's how it was like with me, the chalet, and the beach.. It was my escape, whenever I needed a place to run to, I'd hold it all in, just to that special moment where I know I'd be there and everything will be erased, where I can think of a solution to all my worries..

I went up to my room and dropped all my stuff, I took my iPhone, my headphones, my phone, and I left;
"Mama ana 6al3a atmasha" I yelled to my mother and I left

I walked around, looked at the captivating moonlight shine across over the big dark gulf.. I wondered, how would it be like if I had Na9er with me? What would he do? Would he hold me in his arms, and kiss me? Would he stare at me? What would he do? But I guess that's something I won't know, right?

I sent Na9er a message, telling him I got there, ta7amadlii bil salama, and told me that he's with friends, he'll talk to me later hopefully. I told him it was fine, and we'll talk soon.. I was too drained to stay up honestly, so I walked around a bit, listening to music that soothed and fed my soul, fed it with every nutrient it needed, love, hope, faith, strength, everything! You name it, it fed me! An hour or so after walking around, I called it a night.. I sent him a message telling him I was drained, and I'm going to bed, he told me it was okay, and he bid his goodnight and I left..

Tomorrow's a new day.. Another chance to life, to either make it better, or, well.. Dwell on the bad shit you did in the past.. But hey, make it better, because nothing is worth it!;)
























I woke up the next morning to my cousin shaking me..
"Maisa? Mayous! Goumay!" Layal said
"Hmm? Sh9ayir?!" I woke up
"Mu 9ayir shay, bes yallah goumay!" she giggled
"Mmmzain!" I said and got out of my bed, "ni6ray! ya wailich enmishaytay!" I told her
"Hehe okay" she said

I went to the bathroom and got cleaned up, I brushed my teeth, washed my face and got dressed. I wore my GAP hoodie with tights and my UGG boots, I pulled my hair into a bun, and that was it for me.
"Yallah?" I asked
"Yallah!" She smiled
"Tarayagtay?" I asked her
"La2, yait aga3dich 3ashan enrou7 nitrayag.. Etrou7een Cafe 26? We'll get something from there.." She said
"Yeah, sure, ma3indii mani3, bes khan nis2el awal.." I told her
"Ee, si2lay, omii matgoul shay madamii wiyach" she said
and it was true, murt 3amii matgoul shay as long as Layal was with me, see I'm the goody-too-shoes in the family, so I was trusted really well..
I asked my mother and she said we can go; so we headed for breakfast at a cafe.. how exciting with us ashkalna chithii!;p

While we ate, I told her about Na9er.. I told her everything.. She beamed, she saw in him everything I saw.. She liked him.. She was like my little sister, since she had no sisters, she'd run to me when something happened. Sure, sometimes we get too wrapped up in our own worlds, but once we reconnect, we're inseparable..

We headed back to the chalet and Na9er sent me a message;
"Gm;*" he said
"Morning honey;*" I replied

"I feel like driving.." I looked at Layal with a mischief in my eyes
"DRIVE!" She grinned
the point of the driving is to go crazy together

I ran to my mother and nagged her to let me drive my fathers car, and since my father was out of the country oo tabii il fakka minii, she said okay;p
We got into the car, blasted the stereo, and drove around dancing and singing; Layal kept taking pictures of me, every little move, she snapped it.

As I drove out of the gate, Layal's brother swung the gate forward, the next thing I knew..


I hear a screech..




a HUGE scratch on the car.. :)

Oh wow.. My father shall have my head!

I backed up, and drove to my mother. I told her what happened and she was as worried and scared of my father's reaction as I was!

I ran up the stairs to my room with Layal and locked the door. We sat on my bed and stared at each other, still in shock.. Did that really happen? We laughed out, but the kind that went haha then you stop, still reminiscing.

"Call Na9er! Tell him what happened, maybe he can help!" She told me
"Uhm, okay. I won't call, I'll send him a message." I told her
"Just do something!" She ushered
"Okay!" I said as I punched the four letter word - SHIT - into a new composed message.

"What?" was the reply I got
I told him what happened, and he called me laughing; can you believe it?! He's laughing at me.
"Na9er! Instead of laughing, help me?!" I yelled
"Shasawii?!" He laughed
"Madrii! Bes shagoul 7eg uboy when he asks!" I told him
"You can't say anything, you busted his car" I could feel him smile on the other side of the phone.
"Okay." I pouted, "I'll talk to you later okay?" I told him
"Okay" he told me

Me and Layal decided to take a walk.. We started on the beach, then made our way up to the garden. I was still scared of my fathers reaction.. So I was constantly in contact with him via messages...
I tucked my phone in my pocket, and when I pulled it back out, I found a missed call from him.
I wondered why he called.. So I called him back..

"Hala, you called?" I asked him
"No." He said, in a way that sounded as if he was annoyed
What the.....? I asked myself
"Um, I found a missed call from you.." I said calmly
"I didn't call." He said firmly.
"Um, okay then. I'll go, uh, bye..?" I said in a way that showed that I was dumbfounded
What he said next, still shocks me to this very day..

*-*-*-*

There you go! I hope you liked it :)

I love you all, enjoy your summer and stay safe!:*

Your feedback is appreciated! :)

Love,
-Q;*

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Stupid In Love. Part 15.

Part 15! :) Just for my loves! I hope you like it!:* It's not long, but it's the best I can do!

*-*-*-*

As I stood there, I felt something.. Something firm and strong make its way up.. Made its way up the side of my body, up my shirt.. It was Na9er’s hand..

He had his lips on mine, an arm around my waist, and a hand moving up my shirt. You know when you watch a movie? And it gets to a steamy part? And then the guy has his arm around her and his hand going up her shirt feeling every curve of her body and all that? Yeah.. That was it..

I quickly pulled away and moved his hand away from my body. I looked at him and he smiled, the naughty boy smile, the one that’s like I want you, that kind of smile..

Oh my God, that boy drove me wild in every way; from the way he talked, to the way he used to make fun of me. But because it was the reckless, carefree kind of thing that you only read in books, it was all good. I never thought I’d meet a guy like him, not once in my life; all I knew is what I read from blogs, and story books, and I was hoping one day I’d look around and I’ll find that story book love, and then, Na9er came along.. And I thought I found the story I want to live.

When he smiled, I looked at him, then slowly pulled my lips into a familiar smile.. One that had a story of a girl wanting to show the one she wants what he’d want and need, but wouldn’t.. A smile that teased him..

I know I know, I’m not an innocent angel. Sometimes teasing him makes me get what I want.

I giggled to myself, and he smiled at my giggles.

“Rikbay” he told me

“Arkab wain?” I asked acting stupid

“Elsayara, ba3ad wain?” he told me

“I’m not getting in” I said firmly

“ya3nii tabeen a7ed yishoufna chithii? 3adii?” he teased

“Ma7ed ra7 yishoufna, we’re kinda in a deserted place” I said

“Kaifich” he said and I smiled


I stood there and looked at him..

I finally got him..

Na9er is now mine..

All the tears I cried, everything I went through..

It was all worth it..

The boy is mine.

The BOY is MINE.

After the couple minutes of quiet, he broke the ice in a silly way, thinking of it now, I can’t help but laugh

“You can’t kiss” he laughed

I kicked him.

Yeah, I KICKED him!

“Akeed I can’t kiss! I don’t know how! Forgot you’re my first?!” I retorted

“Hahaha, yeah” he laughed

I said something that sounded so stupid!

“bes I know how to kiss!” I yelled

He laughed

“You kicked me, and told me you know how to kiss, now you kiss me, I kissed you, this time you kiss me, lets see what you can do” he teased

“I wont”

“You kicked me! You said you know how! I wanna see!” he snickered

“Mabii” I blushed

He laughed and just looked at me

He looked at me in a way I don’t know how to describe, something like, if could devour me, taste every flavor of my lips, my neck, and feel every curve of my body, he’d do so..

So I took a step back..

We were quiet for a bit..

He looked at the clock in his car..

“It’s getting late.. I think I should go, and you should go in, I don’t want your mother to call you wintay mu emsawya shay,” he ridiculed

“Yeah,” I laughed, “I better go..” I said

even though every emotion in me wanted me to turn around, kiss him so hard and then run across the street, where he can’t come after me..

“Deeray balich” he told me

“Kaaay!” I yelled and walked away

Ay deeray balich? A car almost ran me over, because I was staring at my phone, I was calling 3anoud, calling Jawa, trying to tell them what happened.

He was probably still standing there, watching me, I felt my body heat up, my neck burned and I felt beads of sweat forming. I kept walking like nothing happened. Then, I almost tripped over my own feet. Someone hit me with something!!!!!!!

I filled them in with everything, 3anoud’s reaction was,

“Now I want to have my first kiss!” she yelled and I laughed in response

The next hour or so was a hard core work out, feeling great, I was happy, I was smiling like a maniac, I was listening to up beat songs, I was over the moon..

It was pure, no strings attached joy.

I went home, packed up, and I was off to chalet.. It was time to see how the distance would do us both..

The distance..

Well..

It..

*-*-*-*

There you go!;) Part 15:) Not as long as part 14, but I’m really busy with school and everything:(

I’ll try posting a new post soon just for you guys!:*

I love you!

And good luck to you all with your finals! I know it’s hectic, but we’re almost done with this year baby!;)

Keep doing what you do best! Again, I love you!


-Q;*

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Hello x

Good morning my loves x

This isn't a story post, but actually it's a little consultation to you.
I've been looking at the Wordpress blogs and I really like them, but I've been wondering, should I switch to Wordpress or stay on Blogspot.

Blogspot will ALWAYS be my start, the reason you all know and read my stories, it's like my first agent, but maybe it's time for a change..

So, I was wondering, if I switch to Wordpress, would you still read? Or should I stay here?
I have another idea, but I'm not sure about it yet though;p Which is to post in both, on Blogspot, and on Wordpress. There won't be any change in the stories, they'll be exactly the same, but they sure will look different.

The ones on Wordpress might have pictures and those things while the ones on Blogspot might not.

So you decide what you would like, whatever fits your needs and desires best, is perfect with me. :)

Have a good day my angels! And don't forget, you can find me on here, on my email (queenofmyhood@hotmail.com), or on Twitter.

I hope you're all doing well;
Allah e7afithkum x
I love you all xx

-Q

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Stupid In Love. Part 14.

Hii there my loves x
I just want to take this time and thank each and every one of you for your ongoing support. You all have made me so much stronger, and have given me the freedom of speech I didn’t find anywhere else. You have supported me from the very beginning, and I thank you for that. You don’t know how much each and every one of you means to me.
I’m here for you all whenever I’m needed, just like you’ve been there for me from the start, that’s the only way I can pay you all back, actually, that’s not enough, but I don’t know what else I can do to pay you back. But I just hope that you can come to me when you need help with something, when you need a piece of advice, when you need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll be here. I’ll have my hand out for you, I’ll be your big sister if you need me, I’ll be your best friend if that’s what you need. I’ll be exactly what you need.
Again, thank you for the ongoing support.
I love each and every one of you.
Xx

*-*-*-*
Now you’ve all known what happened in the first two meetings with Na9er, you’ve seen how I cried, you’ve seen how I smiled, how I giggled, and you’ve felt every thing inside of me. You’ve been me in my last posts. Now you’ll be me again.. It’s time for you to jump into my shoes another time..
Remember when Na9er told me I was lying, when I didn’t tell him I “talk” to guys and all of that? Yeah, he brought it up again, we got into some fight and he wouldn’t talk to me.
I remember calling up a friend and crying so hard, I cried like there was no tomorrow.
This friend is not one I mentioned before, she’s not even Kuwaiti, she’s Emarati, so lets just call her Flana.
“Flanaaa! I can’t do this! I can’t live like this! He knows I want him, he knows I love him! Then why all this torture?! Why does he want to keep hurting me?!” I cried into the phone
“Mimi 7ayatii, rou7ii, heday heday, eta9lee 3alaih o0 ramseeh, estafsiree emna, 3urfii why’s he acting this way?!” she consoled me
“Flana, he doesn’t want to get hurt! He’s scared I’ll hurt him!” I yelled
I remember I was sitting in a corner in my room crying, yelling into the phone when my breathing was shallow like someone was suffocating me, I was trembling so much I couldn’t hold the phone correctly.
“Sawee ilee giltlich etsaweena! I’m gonna hang up oo intee ra7 tita9lain 3alaih witramseena, tell him you want to see him, you need to talk, insist on it. Don’t step down, keep telling him you need to see him elain yiwafi8!” She instructed me
“*sniff sniff* okay, inshallah” I told her
“Yallah, wipe those tears and call him, you’re strong, I know you. Yallah 7abeebtii, nirmis ba3dain” is what she told me as I sensed a smile creep on her face
“Inshallah, and flana, thank you..” I said
“Don’t thank me, I’m your big sister” she kissed me through the phone
I hung up and got up to wash my face, it was time to calm down and get my strength back.
I was never the one to let the guy control me, I would control him, he would go crazy in attempting to control me, but soon enough, he’d leave, broken, and I’d be standing tall.
I knew calling him wouldn’t work because he’s giving me the silent treatment, so I sent him a text message.
“Hii, I need to see you.”
“No.” is what he replied
I got mad then, I got pissed, it was like fire was coming out of my ears.
“Shno no?!” I replied
“No, you don’t need to see me.”
“How the f*ck do you know?! I NEED to see you!” I told him
“I don’t want to see you.”
“Well I want to see you.” I retorted
“Say it over the phone.” He said
“No, it won’t work on the phone, I need to see you. Tomorrow.” I demanded
“I’m sick, I can’t tomorrow.” He told me
“Okay, when you’re feeling better then.”
“Okay” he told me
YES! I won! Woah! That felt good! And when I see good, like REALLY good! The smile was plastered on my face, I felt strong, once again, I’ve done it. :)
That was Monday..
Wednesday..
“Hii, are you feeling better?” I asked
“Hey, yeah I am:)” he told me
“El7imdella..” I replied
“Eeh, el7imdella:)”
2 minutes later..
“So when do you want to see me?” He asked
“Tomorrow?” I told him
“Sure, when and where?” He asked me
“I’ll tell you tomorrow” I told him
“Okay, but before school ends please”
“5ala9, wela ehimik” I comforted him

Thursday..
It was October 21st, 2009.
My day was fully planned..
School, send Na9er the location, meet him, then chalet. That was how it was going to be.
I woke up in the morning making sure my hair looked good, I made sure to take my Victoria’s Secret lip gloss with me to school, and my most complementing sweats. So after I picked my sweats, I pulled out a plain white v-neck shirt that I got from H&M. I folded them and rammed them into my bag hurriedly.
“Shit! Mascara!” I whispered in a loud voice.
I opened my drawer and pulled out my mascara, blush and eye lash curler. Yeah yeah, I know, why all that for a guy? Because if anything bad happened, I wanted to walk away looking like a goddess. Sure, not in sweats and all, but at least, I’d want him to know that he lost something. Something valuable!
I took my bag and ran down the stairs; picked up my coffee and off to school I went.
It was around 1:30 when I sent Na9er the location and time.
“Hii, so are we on for today?” I asked him
“Yup, wein?” he asked
“Um, my gym?” I asked
“Sure, ay gym?” He asked me
“Flex Family. Bneid il Gar, back parking” I told him
“Akhaf a7ed yishoufna” He said
“No don’t worry, maku a7ed, it’s abandoned, well other for lihnoud ilee feeha;p” I sent him
“Loool ok:p What time?”
“At around 3?” I asked
“Will be there:)”
“See ya” was the last thing I sent him
I started talking to 3anoud about it, and she insisted on helping me get ready since we had the last period together and I needed to get ready and knock the boy off his feet!
Bell rang, and me and 3anoud RAAAAAN to the bathroom, dodging every human being we ran into.
I locked myself in a bathroom stall and started to undress
“Maisa! Yallah!” She laughed
“Okay okay! I’m coming!” I giggled
I got out and ran to where 3anoud was;
“Eyelash curler!” I yelled as she handed it to me
You know when you look at those movies and they say something and they quickly hand over that very thing they asked for? It was like that; and before long I was done.
I ran down and when I almost got to my car.. I realized..






I forgot my school back upstairs.. In the THIRD floor bathroom.
How smart Maisa! Guess what I did? I ran to my car, threw in my bad with all my clothes, then ran back up to get my school bag.. By the time I got down stairs, I was out of breath, with beads of sweat forming at the back of my neck and the side of my face. MU WAGTAAA!! I turned on the air conditioning and got it to the highest temperature it could go to.
“Wainich?” He sent me a message
I looked at my phone; it was already past 3. SHITT!! Na9er is VERY accurate with time. When he says he’ll be there at a certain time, he’ll be there.
“Sorry! Kanii I’m 5 minutes away, i5tii ta2a5erat!:/” I lied; it was a white lie. Don’t murder me!:/
“Okay, I’m there”
2 minutes later, my driver dropped me off with my sister, and he left, I remember standing there, I looked around and didn’t see him at all.. I called him..
One ring..
Two rings..
“I see you” was the hello I got
“Yuma wainik?” I asked, “I don’t see you..”
“Come across the street, ana ayeech..” he said
“Okay, ana 3ind the silver corolla” I told him
“Okay”
and we hung up
I walked up to the silver corolla, and I saw him walk up to me..
The way he looked had me in a daze..
He coyly looked around, but not in the way that irritated me, the one that made me want to jump on him,
“Hii” he said
“Hii” I replied as I wrapped my arms around me, YES, I wrapped my arms around MYSELF. That wasn’t a typo, I did do that, I guess it’s what you do when you stand up in defense of yourself? I don’t know, all I know is that I did that.
“So..” He said as he looked at me, note that he didn’t look me in the eye
“6ali3nii” I told him
“Ga3id a6al3ich” he said
“No! Look me in the eye!” I demanded
“Magdar..” He said
“Why?!” I laughed
“Madrii..” He said as he lowered his head
I giggled when he lowered his head and said, “okay”
“So what do you want to talk about?” he asked me
“Na9er, tikfa goulii, ana ga9art ib 7agik?! Did I lie to you?! Did you tell me to do something that I didn’t?! You wanted all the guys on my msn to be deleted, sawait ilee tabeeh, facebook, you saw it, kilihum ma3ay in school or are my cousins! You and A7med are the only ones that aren’t from school or related to me! Tell me! Ana ga9art ib 7agik?!” I yelled
“La2..” He said
“3ayal tell me! Tell me why you’ve been hurting me so much! For F*cks sake! Look at me now! I’m shaking just standing right in front of you! You have that much of a hold on me!” I kept yelling
He was quiet, imnazil rasa..
Suddenly, my phone rings.
SHIT! Wagta?! I look.. My mother..
“Digeega, omii” I said and he motioned for me to take it
I picked up,
“Aloo?” I said
“Hala mama”
“Ana bil gym”
“I thought I did! Imbella, I told you!” I said
“Oh, yimken nisait? I’ll be done soon inshallah”
“I stopped running 3ashan I pick up when you called” I told her
“Inshallah, 5ala9 3ayal bes arid a5ali9 shughlii” I told my mom and hung up.
“Shfeeha?” he asked
“La nothing, she just asked me why I didn’t tell her I’m coming to the gym, bes I did..” I told him
“Oh..” He said
We were quiet for about 5 minutes, so I turned around and leaned on the car, I slowly settled my phones on the car and just looked at my hands.
“Maisa?” He said
“Hmm?” I asked as I turned around slightly
“Do you wanna be with me?” He asked me
“You know the answer to that..” I smiled
“No, I want to hear it from you”
“Na9er, I’ve said it a million times, oo inta adra bil jawab..” I said again
“La2, abii asma3’ha minich..” He smiled
“Yes.. I do..” I said
And that smile that makes me melt in my place formed, that smile that makes my knees buckle and my bones turn to mush, that was the smile I saw.. :)

I started giggling and I turned around and leaned against the car one more time.. He came closer and leaned on the car next to me, I turned around and looked up at him and smiled, he smiled down at me.. I was quiet for maybe a minute or so when I felt something make it’s way around my arm..
Na9er slid his hand under my arm and slowly intertwined our fingers as we leaned against the car, that intertwinement made the butterflies in my stomach stir, I felt like they were going to come up out of my stomach and out of my mouth. He squeezed my hand and I rubbed my thumb on the side of his palm and thumb when he squeezed my hand.
I looked up and a shy smile formed
“If you want me to kiss you, come closer” he teased
“You think I want you to kiss me?!” I laughed, “nope I don’t” I smiled
“I know you do” he smiled at me
I threw my head back and laughed
“Come with me” he pulled me
“Wain ray7een?”I said and I stiffened my legs
“My car” he said
“No, manii ray7a to your car” I stated
“ta3alay! I’m not going to do anything!”
“Mabiiiii!” I said
“Ta3alay!” He insisted
He came closer and wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me,
“Nooo!” I said
“Wallah manii emsawii shay!” he said as he took a hold on my jacket
“Ahh! Zain zain!” I said as I walked at his pace, “you don’t have to pull me you know!” I said
“Ba5ith jakaitich” he told me
“Heeeey! La2! That’s my favorite jacket! I’ll give you something ba3dain” I said as I yanked my jacket out of his hand
“Ya3nii shino?! You’ll give me an earring?! Wila what?!” He joked
“La I’ll give you a hoodie” I laughed
“Haha not my size!”
“I have oversized hoodies you know!” I retorted
“Okay okay” he said
by then we were leaning against his car, an Escalade.
I was leaning against him, I would look up and I’d see his face.. In height, I’d be up to Na9er’s nose.. Perfect height..
He lifted my chin with his index finger..
The next thing I knew…




His lips were on mine..



And slowly after that, I felt his tongue pierce my lips and make way into my mouth..

I was in too much shock to move a muscle..
That kiss ended up turning into a make out session..
He kept trying to part my legs with his knees, and I would push his knees away.
He moved to the side of his car and opened the door to the backseat, he tried to make me get in but I didn’t. I wouldn’t dare get into his car, I mean I know Na9er, I know what he’s capable of, but he wouldn’t hurt me, but even though, I won’t get into his car just incase someone was looking..
The kissing went on, of course he was doing all the work since I was inexperienced! That’s when I felt something..

*-*-*-*

I hope you liked it! I made it long! Just to show you how much you all mean to me! xx
Goodnight my loves, and have a splendid weekend! :)
Please comment, and give me feedback:)
I love you xx

-Q

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Stupid In Love. Part 13.

Okay okay! I can’t stay away for too long!;p So here’s part 13, I’ll try to make it longer.. but no guarantees.. :(

So here we go!:)

*-*-*-*

Like I said, when I gave up and started to watch my movie, my phone vibrated.. It was Na9er *melts*

“;**” said the message

“Hehe hii;*” I replied

“You looked nice;*” He told me

I started feeling all tingly, and giggly when I read that,

“Hehe 3ashanik;)” I told him

“;*******” I got back from him

As we kept watching the movie, it started getting very sad, and all three of us started crying, looking at each other, laughing at how we all looked, and cry again

“Thank God I saw you gabil this part” I sent him

“Haha leish?:p” He sent me

“We’re crying so much min the movie:$” I replied

“hahaha girls:p” He replied

As the movie came to an end, I paid attention to the movie other than my phone, and when we got out, I replied to him, saying that sure, we might be girls and we cry, but we have feeling o ina nir7am o en7is, unlike guys, and he laughed it off. He didn’t take it as an insult. That’s how it was with me and Na9er, cool, sweet, and everything I ever wanted…

We left the movie theater, and he called me

“7ubiiii!” He yelled

“Hehe hela” I replied giggling

“Wainich?” he asked me

“Tawna 6al3een min the movie theater.. Inta wainik?” I asked him

“Starbucks” he said

“Ohhh ma6ala3taw?” I asked him

“La2, ga3deen, ta3alay?” He told me

“We were heading that way anyway, hehe, I’ll see you in a bit” I told him

“5ala9 okay, can’t wait honey” he told me

Oh my Lord. Remembering him saying those words to me makes every strand of hair on my body stand, and every nerve in my body tingle.

We got to Starbucks and I saw him sitting in the middle of the café with 5alid. The way he smiled when he saw me, the way he looked around to see if some dude was following me, he really cared for me.. He really wanted me to be his.. He just never took the risk.. Not yet anyway..

We stood in line, when he saw we were safe, no guys behind us, and we were okay, he left. He sent me a message saying he left in case someone saw us upstairs he doesn’t want to give them the benefit of the doubt that we were meeting up, and he’d call me as soon as he gets in the car.

2 minutes later, he calls. I picked up.

We talked, and talked.. Laughed, and laughed..

“Jawa 3indich?” He asked

Remembering it makes my blood boil.

“Jawa, Na9er yabii ekalmich” I handed her the phone.

She pushed it back to me, and shook her head.

“Mabii!” she mouthed

Na9er insisted, so I told her to talk to him and get it over with.

They talked, ihya kalimta ib nafsiya.. When I got my phone back, he said he’ll text me, but we’ll talk later on the phone. We hung up.

“Shgal?” I asked Jawa

“He said that today was our one year anniversary of knowing each other..” She told me

I wanted to claw her face, my best friend or not, when I fall in love, I love, and I love hard.

We kept sending messages back and forth to each other – me and Na9er that is.

When I got home, he sent me a message saying that I had a “nice butt”. And I replied with “I know;) I’ve been told, you ain’t the first;)”. Then.. The next message I got had me jumping up and down.

“Hehe, I wanted to kiss you..”

“Why didn’t you kiss me 3ayal?!” I asked him

“Looool! There were people!:p”

“I don’t care! Next time you kiss me!(a)” I said

“Looool! Oki;p” He told me

“Hehe;$”

“I couldn’t look in your eyes..” was next…

“Hahaha!:p Laish ya3nii? Es7irouk?:p” I was making fun of him! I wasn’t being serious!

“Eeh, kind of..” he replied

“Ehehe;)” I answered

“;*”

After that, I left my phone inside my room, while me Jawa and 3anoud went outside and giggled like maniacs on my balcony.

Meeting numero tres is yet to come.. That one, I remember the freaking date of it, and every single detail of it. Let’s see what shall be your reaction once it comes around the corner;)

*-*-*-*

Part 13! :) Tell me what you think my loves xx

Goodnight xx

-Q